Honestly you guys, I consider myself a boundary queen. But I wasn’t always this way. I think it took having kids for me to really realize how important keeping your own sanity, peace, and energy is. And now I just want everyone to feel this way.

Whenever I talk to friends who are dealing with drama or a difficult time, I love giving my two cents. Not that I think my advice is the best advice ever or anything, everyone needs to make their own decisions for sure, but I think things are just so black and white for me. I no longer have that weight of worrying about how other people might feel or perceive a situation. I love being able to ask my girlfriends, like okay- do you want to do this thing? The initial response is always well no- BUT I have too, I don’t want him/her to be mad, I’ve gone out of my way in the past, etc. My POV is always like, if you don’t want to do something, don’t do it. If it is going to stress you out or invade your own peace/energy, no is the bottom line and there doesn’t need to be additional reasoning or explaining. Real friends will understand that and never hold it against you.

I’ll be the first to admit, I say no to a lot of parties these days (sorry to those friends reading this, however they all know why), strictly because I don’t like staying out late, I don’t like driving far by myself, or by myself with my kids, and/or it just doesn’t match my vibe. I don’t drink, so going to sit at a bar with friends who are drinking is just not a good time for me. Coffee date or brunch? That’s more my thing.

My bottom line applies to family too. I’ve actually recently stopped attending some family functions because they don’t always end up being family appropriate and/or I disagree with how some people are leading their lives– which again, is totally fine, but I’m just not going to bring my children around it.

Keeping my and my family’s peace is the bottom line. If me saying no to things gets me labeled a bitch, then so be it LOL. But me and my family? I promise you, we’re so good.

So my advice for sticking with boundaries, don’t let yourself get guilt ridden into doing something you don’t want to do. That’s really it. If your gut instinct is not to do something or go somewhere, then don’t. I promise the more you stop bending over backward for people, the more at peace you’ll feel, you’ll also get so much more confident in your decisions and will realize how important spending your energy on things that actually matter becomes.